Minority Majority

I was walking past my local newsstand the other day (yes, they still have those) when the headline caught my eye: “Minorities Are Now Majority Of US Births”.  Oh joy.  Isn’t that clever?  See, by using a term to describe ethnicities other than the white majority in the U.S. population, clever newspaper editors can grab your attention by claiming the “minority” to now be the “majority.”  This news even caused an official government spokesperson to use these linguistic gymnastics:

Well.  You know what this means?  Yep, I went right to my local online comment section to see what the pulse of America would have to say about this.  Let’s see how long it will take before…oh, right there with the very first comment, huh “John Bailo”?

“dmamel” tries to take a sarcastic look at the linguistics of this news…or was he being sarcastic?  It’s so hard to tell…

Yes.  You’re right “donotcensorl.”  It is possible he was being sarcastic.  If only there was some way for us to know for sure; some clue.  Perhaps a big “LOL” at the end of his post!  But that would take reading comprehension, wouldn’t it?  You know what is extra funny about that?  Four other people “liked” that comment!

“RedToppolino” here takes a “facts” based approached by using statistics that he just made up…and then takes an unusual detour on our favorite former Arkansas Governor’s indiscretion with a “bathroom fixture.” 

Thank God, “RedT” returned to the made-up facts after that…whew!

“Limeygirl” looks to have a reasonable take on this…

Well, it’s nice to have “patriotdad76” to bring us back to the reality of the yeoman’s work being done by the whites to subsidize all the non-working minorities.  Why do racists always paint themselves as ‘patriots’?  It’s an unusual phenomenon.

“TerenceTan” has yet another take on the situation…based on his name, this should be good:

Translation:  "I want to have sex with white women but they won’t have sex with me, ergo, they just don’t like sex."  Got it.  Who’s next?

Oh, C'mon!  Why are you making this so easy for me?  Nothing better than a stereotype from a person with “TrustFund” in their name.

Does anyone want to make a reasonable comment here?  You, sir, “Joel Gong”…what do you have to say?

Oh, crap.  Yes.  Yes.  THAT’s the elephant in the room.  They are all illegal “anchor babies.” I think “eyeofsauron” has hit on the solution.  Being born here should not qualify you for citizenship.  That’s crazy.  Incidentally, “eyeofsauron” how did you become a citizen?  Born here?  Got proof?   Sheesh. 

Well, once again I have not been disappointed by my fellow internet denizens.  There is not subject too small that we can’t break immediately into camps and call each other names.  American’s used to refer to their homeland proudly as a “melting pot” but I guess those days are gone.  Or…perhaps I am missing the true point here.  Maybe, despite these ignorant protestations from a few, there are still obviously enough people from diverse backgrounds that like each other enough to have sex and reproduce.  I feel better now.

Be Reasonable